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I Found What I Was Missing

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Isn’t traveling the best. At the start I am filled with excitement and busyness and can’t sit still for a moment.
I want to go Go GO somewhere, I might be missing something and even if I don’t know what it is…I might be missing something!

Anywhere. That’s where I wanted to be, at the start. But after a few days I realize, I can’t see it all. Even if I had the strength of giants and the wind would carry me everywhere, I would miss something. Where is my strength? Where is my stamina? Damn these feets who are failing me now.

But that wouldn’t stop me. Still, I might miss something so I rush out and try again. And come back here to my brothers house, tired and somewhat frazzled and wondering what I missed. I should have tried to go to Berkley. Maybe I should have chanced a hike in San Diablo Canyon, or tried for Napa and Sonoma. Are the Raiders playing? What am I missing.

Then it occured to me. I knew what I was missing. I was missing the chance to be quiet. To rest. To relax. To watch squirrels climbing the oak trees in the backyard, the Deer and her fawn that travel through the trees out back. The warm wind that ruffles the pool water, pushing the ball around especially for me, the cherished visitor. The fridge full of delicacies picked out especially for me. The bird calls, the silence, the heat, the peace.

I wasn’t missing anything. Except maybe home.

Afoot and lighthearted, I take to the open road,
Healthy, free, the world before me,
The long brown path before me leading wherever I choose.

Henceforth I ask not good fortune, I myself am good fortune,
Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing,
Done with indoor complaints, libraries, querulous criticisms
Strong and content, I travel the open road.

The earth, that is sufficient,
I do not want the constellations any nearer,
I know they are very well where they are,
I know they suffice for those who belong to them

(Still here I carry my old delicious burdens,
I carry them, men and women, I carry them with me wherever I go,
I swear it’s impossible for me to get rid of them
I am fill’d with them, and I will fill them in return)

Walt Whitman -from Song of the Open Road

The Family

The Family

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8 thoughts on “I Found What I Was Missing

  1. Home made moustaches! So fun! Yes, I am loving this place but I miss everyone. When I get home I will miss my brother and his beautiful family, too. My little niece calls me Anpanman which is a bald, red cheeked Japanese cartoon character. It’s so cute! She is only amost 3 and only speaks japanese right now. Mom and Dad want her to be bi lingual so she goes to japanese day care. Nothing like having a little girl sit on your lap while you read her a story written in japanese. I just make it up as we go. I think she suspects something…

  2. Great family photo, Laura. The words from the song is deep and made me pause to reflect. We are all in the same boat. We are just passing by this earth. Life is transcient. Life is made up of moments. Live your life. Be free to speak and be free to have quiet moments. Savour life. Live life! Wishing you and your family happiness. Lots of hugs and best wishes.

There is no sin except stupidity.

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