Home » dealing with it. » Give the dog a bone.

Give the dog a bone.


Yesterday I spent a good part of the day on the phone and at the kitchen table filling out forms. Today was follow through. Follow through is when you don’t give up and hope it all just turns out.

Today I had a lot to do. First thing in the morning was my dental appt. Dr. Bell needed to adjust my fake tooth thingy so it would fit properly. We were trying to save my teeth when I got told about cancer. Then it became urgent that three be pulled before I could start chemotherapy. If i got an abscess or something went wrong in my mouth it could cause complications. So there was some emergency dental work done back before I started writing this. Back when I was just out of the hospital. B.C. (Before chemotherapy)

Then I drove out to the Department of Housing and Human Services in Bremerton. It’s a long drive. 30 miles or so on the highway, I thought I would stop and get my tires checked. I wasn’t sure when I last checked the air in them. Since before surgery. I haven’t been driving a lot.

The nice young man at Kitsap Tires told me they were overfilled. Ay yi yi…I had them at 40lbs instead of 32 lbs. He let air out of them for me while I followed him around chatting away. Then we both stood there and just looked at my car.

I’m not car proud. It’s transportation. But boy oh boy, she’s in rough shape now that I see it. I had to use duct tape along the windshield and the roof this winter so the rain wouldn’t leak in. There’s the missing hub cap from my high speed tire blow out on the freeway last fall. Left front too. Very exciting moment there, swerving all over the place…with 3 dogs, groceries and sister. Rush hour. Whew…the hub cap is still there in the median where it will remain.

There are various scratches and little blemishes in the paint. There is mud and hay clinging to the back from transporting the chicken hay home in the trunk. It won’t close on a bale so it’s always got to be tied shut. So there was a piece of blue twine. A dog blanket on the back seat for when they jump in the ocean and roll in the sand. It looks like hell AND there’s no reverse.

Not a thing to do about it though. It’s not in the plans. A new car? A new, used car, even? No. So I just pulled the duct tape that was loose off the roofline and said thank you. The radio works fine.
That’s the main thing.

DHHS was crowded. I followed my doctors instructions and wore my mask and gloves and got stared at. I read all the signs they had hanging up telling me how to ‘Check in here’ and where to sit and to listen for my name to be called. There was a young mom (I mean 16 or so) with the cutest little baby who just stared and stared at me over her shoulder. Disconcerting. Babies can’t see you smile behind a mask. I took it off for a second so she could see my face and she smiled at me. Babies…born charmers.

A man sat down behind me and struck up a flirtatious conversation with a young woman who was, it turned out, waiting for a job interview. He told her all about his knee injury from when he played football. He said he’d played in the Tostada Bowl. I couldn’t make that up. The woman was really kind and didn’t interrupt him once. I think he just wanted to tell his story to someone. A lot of the conversation was about how generous and simple hearted he was. But with bad knees. As it happened though, he really was generous and kind hearted. While I was rummaging through my large bag, looking for my paperwork, getting ready, he tapped me on the shoulder and handed me my large turquoise ring which had fallen out of my bag and rolled under my chair.

It’s a special ring, given to me by my sister in law. It’s teal blue. The color of ovarian cancer awareness. I think I had brought it just because its so pretty. I was wearing gloves so I didn’t have it on…but to have lost it! So thank you, you nice man at DHHS, you are amazing! I hope you got what you wanted. I did. And more instructions to ‘Call this number to activate your card…’ Sigh…
Give a dog a bone, indeed.

Then I went to the thrift store to see if I could find something, I don’t know what. And I did. Apothecary glasses. I bought a set many many years ago when I was visiting Wisconsin. Old cocktail glasses from the 50’s with apothecary symbols printed on them in that thick matte paint with gold trim and quite beautiful. Today I found the tall 20 oz version. For 3$ each. I was so jazzed. I had them wrapped up immediately. My treasure. I also found a super dishy BCBG cord skirt for next to nothing.

I was all fired up and happy the way you get when you have something you love and its new to you and then I saw the wigs. Sad wigs. Gray, little curly haired wigs. There were 3 of them on styrofoam heads and it made me catch my breath. Someone died and someone donated all their wigs to the St. Vincent de Paul. It made me stop for a second. I was buying stuff. I am planning on surviving this cancer. I’m still adding to my collection. My stuff couldn’t end up here, could it?
I paid for my things and ran away. I had things to do. Things…

And my hair is getting patchy. I drove out of Bremerton the wrong way and thought ‘fuck it.’ Just taking a drive. Listen to the radio. There was nothing good on, though. I went to my old optometrist in Silverdale and I thought since I was out that way, I would see if I could get a pair glasses. My newest pair have vanished since the hospital and I can’t see the tv. It seems that lmy plan was cancelled in 2012. I am on a new plan. Called VSP. Vision Services Plan. She gave me a number to call to get information on who my new provider is. No glasses for me, yet. But more phone time.

When I got home, I got online and found a VSP provider here on the island. I was doing well. shake it off. Keep at it. Staying busy. I grabbed Haida and we went to the optometrist. I’m used to getting an exam and glasses within a week so I was surprised to hear that the exam couldn’t be had until April 10th and the glasses would take 2 weeks after that. So the end of April. wow…my day was crapping out again.

Time for a walk. It was raining and there’s a storm blowing in, here in the Pacific Northwest. It hasn’t really rained for quite awhile – at least a week – so it felt good. Fresh air. Good, happy dog. He somehow found an old dried up Christmas tree and pooped on the top of it as it lay there. On it. Not next to it.

So I went to Safeway and bought him a bone. And I went and bought some nice makeup to cover up the red blotches that are forming on my face. I look quite nice, I thought. Give this old dog a bone too.



There is no sin except stupidity.

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